It's hard to dance with the devil on your back

I was recently introduced to the theory that mental illness results from the influence of demons, of Satan. I suppose it's not a new idea, but I had assumed it only existed in horror movies. Not so. There are some out there who would have you believe that with the appropriate amount of faith, any mental issue can be overcome.

Obviously I dismiss nearly the entire concept. There are many, many origins of mental problems: chemical imbalances, brain injuries, early childhood trauma, genetics, chemical dependency, volatile upbringing. But demons? Not so much.

Moreover, to suggest that mentally ill people simply do not have enough faith, or enough moral strength, to overcome their afflictions is just insulting. A schizophrenic person can no more "pray away" his disease than can a person with leukemia. It's not nearly that cut and dry.

The only element of the "spiritual infirmity" theory that I agree with is a purely metaphorical one. No, I don't believe that the sicknesses are caused by devils. However, they can become like demons, ever-present, tormenting, dragging us down to Hell. I often personified my eating disorder, seeing it as a being all its own, at once my best friend and my worst enemy. Similar to a devil it will promise you the world, but in the end it strips you down to nothing. Like Faust, I made a deal with my devil... my soul in exchange for that which I so badly desired.

To quote a hymn we sang in church recently, "I danced on a Friday when the sky turned black; it's hard to dance with the devil on your back. They buried my body and they thought I'd gone; but I'm the dance and I still go on."

Maybe, at the end, it really is through divine mercy that we are delivered from our devils. That mercy may take many forms: religion, medication, therapy, relationships, personal awakening. We are spiritual beings, and despite great, seemingly insurmountable odds, we still go on.

Let go, and dance with me.