"Shame is a little whip we always carry with us. We can shame ourselves easily; the little whip stings. We often use it to punish our feelings, because they evoke the helpless children we were. So we learn to suppress our feelings of fear, or rage, or desire. We would rather not feel at all than feel the sting of shame.
Why should we punish our feelings? Everyone feels much the same things. Why should our humanity shame us? Perhaps somewhere we acquired the notion that it's wrong to be human; that an inhuman perfection is the only proper public image.
Love can heal the pain of shame. Self-love and self-acceptance can make us strong enough to discard the little whip. We're much more lovable when we acknowledge our humanity and let go of our shame. We're also better able to love others. Shame shuts us up; love opens us to joy."
-from "The Promise of a New Day" by Karen Casey & Martha Vanceburg
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